Escaping writers block, maintaining the rage and getting tired of it

ImageI have the worst writers block. I mean, usually you have to be a writer to get writers block, but that’s the only way I can think of how to describe it. Maybe bloggers blog? I dunno, but it’s pretty bad.

 

I’ve half written maybe 20 blogs, none of them finished, none of them any good (ha ha, never stopped me before I hear you all say – rude!)

I was worried for a while, had I stopped getting mad? I mean, so many of the blogs I used to write were about being mad, mad as hell. That couldn’t really be it though, because I’m still mad. I’ve been sustaining my rage for a lot of years and it’s hardly like there haven’t been things to make me angry lately.

Lingerie football league came to Australia. It’s a thing here now, isn’t that just excellent. Because, lord knows, women’s sports get enough attention with their clothes on we were truly in a post- feminist world enough for that to be a thing that’s okay – boy was I mad.

Sometimes I feel like the world is throwing it all at us feminists. A feminist being, of course, someone who expresses sentiments that differentiate us from doormats. I feel like they’re throwing so much at us because they want us to break. We’re meant to stop being mad and start being sad. I feel like it’s that kind of week.

More men getting off on rape cases, student organisations running events that make fun of rape allegations, Grant Hackett says he destroyed his wife’s belongings because he wanted out. Assange says he’s a refugee because he’s being asked to face allegations that he raped someone. Men are trashing the women’s room at UTS because they don’t think that women should have their own space and then yesterday 13 CABS uses images of terrified women as a lobbying tool against any competition.

That’s only the tip of the iceberg, as it is, so yeah, I’m mad. But what’s more I don’t understand how much more we’re really meant to be able to handle. I think I might have reached my quota for this week, I’ve stopped being mad and started just being sad.

How are we meant to maintain our rage and keep on with the revolution when we’re so tired? When the world keeps throwing the entire bucket of shit at us and we’re meant to keep on walking?

I go to a lot of meetings and events with older women who were fighting feminists in the revolution of the 1960’s and 70’s. Their reactions to me fit into one of two categories. Those who are happy that I’m there, that our generation is still fighting, and those who believe that we’ve given up their fight, gone backwards from the ideals that they once held dear.

“The problem with this is all of you young women, we fought so hard for the changes we needed made, and then you’ve gone and ruined it. Your generation won’t even call themselves feminists”

The woman who said the quote above to me wasn’t meaning to be offensive. She was just voicing her opinion. Her position was academic, older and deeply disappointed. It’s worth saying that, her position is also is fundamentally misinformed.

We haven’t stopped fighting, we’ve gotten tired. I said this at a meeting once and the women in the room all scoffed, how can we be tired when they’re not? I don’t think that they get it. We don’t get to hide away, create our own utopia’s and run away. The equality myth has truly taken over and we no longer have the right. We have to live within this mans, mans world and it hasn’t really changed that much.

We have though, or we’re meant to have. We have to be everything all at once, and I don’t think that there’s any space to advocate against it anymore. If we want everyone to get angry, to be ready to fight, we can’t tell them that they’re wrong. Because they’re not really, they’re just trying to fit into the world that’s been created for them.

So they have to be the Madonna and the whore. They have to be hairless and childlike and strong and weak and all of the other things that this society has decided for them – it’s exhausting.

That’s why we’re tired, that’s why we have the right to be. Women are now meant to not only have it all but they have to be it all. Now we’re asking them to be mad and not sad. I don’t know how much more they can take. Sometimes it’s easier to just be sad and be everything else 

The problem is that nothing is ever really going to change unless we change it for ourselves. To change it we need to get mad- need to find the energy. Just not this week maybe.

 

 

  

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